If only you had recognized her outlandishness or rage for what it was—the genetic source of your own bipolar disorder. You might have been more tolerant of her. Perhaps you wouldn’t have distanced yourself so much. At the very least, you might have asked some questions.

Unfortunately, many people never think to connect the dots in their family’s history of wellness until the day a family member is diagnosed with bipolar. Suddenly, it hits like a ton of bricks—everything falls into place. As one mother describes it, it wasn’t until her son was diagnosed that she recognized her own illness. “Oh my gosh, that’s what’s the matter with me!”

This experience was related in one way or another by several individuals interviewed for this story. Jolted by the diagnosis of a child or a grandchild, an older family member may reluctantly acknowledge the symptoms as his or her own. Sometimes, it comes as a bolt of self-recognition; other times, it’s a case of reluctant consent, a muttered admission, “Yes, that’s me.”

Scientists don’t know how many or which genes are involved in bipolar. But there is no way at pre- sent to determine whether someone will inherit the disorder. Nevertheless, according to a study published in the March 2009 issue of Archives of General Psychiatry, having family members with bipolar disorder is the best predictor of whether an individual will go on to develop the illness.

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Canadian-born Sara Solovitch is a freelance writer based in Santa Cruz, California.