How I Met The Perfect Man

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I’ve briefly touched on how I met my husband, but let me get further into details.

We met through a friend while working at the same place.

When I was introduced, I though “Damn, he’s handsome!” I loved his voice! With my friend, he, and I we all started to hang out. We would go to bars after work and sometimes during lunch. I know I shouldn’t drink while on the job but in my defense I was manic at the time!

Manic = fun me! I did things I normally wouldn’t do otherwise.

going out at night

Anyway, we started developing a relationship, seeing each other everyday. Going out every night. Mind you, this was when my children lived for a brief time with their dad.

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One St.Patrick’s day we went to the city, partied on $1 pint Guinness, and took a limo home! That was a fun night!

My mania took me to new heights! At thus point I started drinking at work. I would empty 1/2 a Naked juice then top it off with vodka! It helped get me through the day. This became a weekly habit for about 3-months.

I was socializing relentlessly with coworkers, going to bars, and night clubs. Being vicarious, wild, and free!

My now boyfriend, thought I was such a free spirit, a delight! Always in a good mood, always the life of the party, always open-minded. I was a drinker (sometimes heavily), a cigarette smoke, and quite jovial.

movein together

After 3-months of dating we decided to move in together. A little soon I agree, but we were totally smitten with each other and were in absolute love.

During the day we worked, at night we went to bars. I remember one night we went out with a friend of mine. I got so drunk, I was throwing up out my boyfriends car window while he was driving!

Note to self: cosmopolitans in abundance on an empty stomach…bad idea!

My mania was somewhat worsening, I was hardly sleeping, I began taking days off work. I was becoming unstable. Mind you, this was all before my diagnosis of type 1 bipolar disorder.

I eventually got my shit together, and started tapering down. I stopped drinking at work, and stopped drinking in the afternoon.

family

My boyfriend and I decided to become a family. We were both financially stable, and decided it was time to get my kids from their dad. They had been with him at this point a little over a year.

We all moved in together. And shortly after I would become pregnant with our child. We continued our courtship for another few years.

On Christmas 2005, my boyfriend proposed! I said “yes!” On St. Patrick’s Day 2006 we were married. At that point we had been together 5 years.

Our story doesn’t end there.

pregnancy-depression

As you know I had severe depression at the end of my last pregnancy. Went through mania after my child was born. Left frequently and even frequented bars when he was only a few weeks old (note: I was not breastfeeding).

I found a job when he was 6-weeks old and was out of the house frequently.

My now husband, put up with a lot. At one point we talked about divorce. But he was stronger than that! We didn’t at the time know I was bipolar.

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I began dressing provocatively, I was less sexually involved with my husband, and quite irritated with him. I became distant. Though, I had several male friends I was flirtatious with.

I was only sexual with my husband, mind you. This lasted a few months until my mania subsided a bit. Then I couldn’t get enough from my husband. I was hypersexual. I was again in absolute love with him.

We went up and down this pattern am for a few years. I separated from my husband numerous times. And threatened divorce countless times.

dating

Only one particular separation did either of us think it was really the end. I had been separated from my husband for 6-months. He had moved out, and I started dating someone else (note: This had NOT developed into a sexual relationship). I got the divorce papers, and filled them out. Though, I hadn’t filed then yet.

My husband who had been sober for years began to drunk heavily again. One day, I had a major fight with my new boyfriend, and needed to talk to someone. I went to the only one I could trust. My husband.

That was the first time in months we weren’t fighting, and actually talked. We even discussed our marriage.

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He never really gave up on me. Frankly, neither had I. Mania does stupid shit with your head, and your thinking process.

Had I been in my right frame of mind, none of this would have EVER happened!

We decided to work it out! We were more in love with each other than ever before. I broke up with the guy I was seeing.

It wasn’t until about a few months later that I was diagnosed. My husband stopped drinking, and we patched our family up.

So you see, I FOUND THE PERFECT MAN! This man has been through hell and back with me, and has chosen to stay with me despite all!

I’m blessed everyday for him, and don’t know if I could EVER live life without him!

If you have a story you’d like to share, please do so in the comments. You are also welcome to DM me via twitter.

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bipolarme

Living with type 1 bipolar disorder, PTSD (due to childhood trauma), Rapid Cycling, and Seasonal Affective Disorder. Writing about my life experiences.

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